MY CONCLUSIONS--and the Sworshk

Their car had broken down. It was cold, windy, rainy, and their car had broken down. "!@#$%!!!" It was Bob. There they were, stranded 60 miles from a city, and their car had broken down.

"I'm cold," said a beautiful Ms. Susan Smith the II. They were on a trip to the beautiful sunny south seas, and they had suddenly heard a "clunk, clunk" coming from the hood.

Suddenly, they heard a fateful "Sworshk" come out of the sky. A huge light followed, and they were temporarily blinded forever.

It is now a week later, and the news has hit the newspapers. They found their car. And they found their corpses. Well, not exactly corpses. Skeletons. No, not skeletons, uh . . . remnants? Well, whatever was left; it wasn't living.

No one knows what really happened that night. Some say that they got in a fight and gorged each other. Some say that creatures from outer space attacked them. And what do I say? Well. . . I went to the Bahamas yesterday, and I saw this weird man smiling. . .