GREEDY MEN BRING PAPER BAGS
The sun was slowly rising from its night grave as the mourning
doves twittered their happy song. Beautiful Sharon Smoth, the goat tenderess
was sleeping in her goat tender’s house on top of the mountain. Ahh. . .
Sharon! The epitome of loveliness. Each line, curve, and fold was perfectly
shaped as if molded by Aphrodite herself. It had been said, in fact, that each
piece of her body, if sold, would be worth $100.00 each.
Down at the bottom of the mountain, "Boy", a poor farm
boy, was preparing for his long trip up the mountain. Today was the day that
he was going to kill Sharon and sell her body to become rich and famous. So
Boy started upward. When he finally reached Sharon’s house she was still
asleep, and, not wanting to scare her, he snuck over to her bed and quickly
slit her body open with a butcher knife. Realizing that he forgot to bring
something to carry his victim in, he carefully, so as not to spill too much
blood, cut her into seven or eight neat stacks, and lifted them into his arms.
Shortly after they started their voyage downward, Boy stumbled and dropped his
prize along the rocky mountain wall. It tumbled all the way to the bottom of
the mountain, where it came to rest along a bush along a bush. When he finally
located the vegetation holding his clump, he found that all the skin, hair,
muscle, and organs had been rubbed off. Dismayed, but still convinced he could
make a profit, he stumbled into town to peddle his goods. He ended up paying
someone to take them away.
Morale: Rolling bones are better lost.